Lately... I don't know... Weird...
I've been going through a weird period. Relationships are complicated and I've been realizing it in a totally new way and aspect. Or maybe I say this cause for some reason I am angry today... Angry at myself and other people... Hate to say it but maybe angry at God. I've been not exactly living lately. I've been praying for things that have not yet happened and I see the people around me change and be happy and things happening to them... But not to me. And you'd say to wait and be patient... And I've been waiting for 19 years and yet here we are. I need a job, I need my family to be saved and changed, I need to be different and better... And yet none of those have happened. I've been called a shit every single day of my life and I'm sick and tired of it. This place is the last place on earth I want to be and yet I'm here not knowing what to do with it. And I pray and sing and read and meet with people and it's all the same. Did I say I meet with people? I meet with my best friend, my boyfriend... and that's about it. Others? Pff, they don't give a rat's ass for me. Facebook and all, friend requests and messages, comments and likes? And if you don't have a facebook suddenly no one knows who you are.